Today was a bad parent day. You know when you have those
days and nothing huge happens but you just know you are not at your best. Your
kid is whiny. You are tired. It is hot. Your kid is just bugging. That is
the day I had today.
After forcing my whiny kid to nap (he is 6) and then
trying to get an errand done at Target (we left a half filled cart in the aisle
and left) I knew I just needed some alone time to regroup. After 40min alone
including a 15min power nap it was back to parenting for me. I decided to
bike/scooter with my kid to my favorite spot around the corner from our house
for an arnold palmer (the kind you dream about good).
All was good as we made
our way to the shop. Once I had the beloved arnold palmer in my hands, I wanted
to sit and enjoy. But my kid grabbed it from my hand and insisted on biking
home. I decided that was probably better for all. As we make our way across the
street my kid bumps his bike into my scooter and the beloved arnold palmer hits
the ground. But the gods were on my side and it didn’t bust open. Amen. But I
yelled and told him to watch where he was going.
On the other side of the street
a woman decided this was the perfect moment to publicly let me know that I was
not at my best today. The conversation went like this:
Oh So Pleasant Lady: You really need to be nicer to him. You
need more patience (shouted from 25 feet away).
Me: I don’t really need you telling me how to parent.
Thanks.
OSPL: You really need to calm down. It isn’t fair to him.
Me: I’m sorry, did I ask your opinion.
OSPL: I am a parent so I know that you need more patience.
Me: Do you think I don’t realize that I have lost my
patience today. Do you think this is a surprise to me? Do you think I need you
to tell me? If you really want to be helpful then why don’t you come over here
and ask if you can take my kid for 2-hours and give me a break. Because I know
I lost my patience.
Needless to say that at this point she got in her car,
disgusted with me and drove away. I am not sure what she thought she was going
to accomplish. She should have seen me at Target when I walked out of the
store. I didn’t even get into the fact that I am a single mom (by choice so
don’t feel sorry for me) and was just having a shitty day, needed a break and
the three sitters I called were all busy.
What I needed in that moment was
someone to tell me to hang there, this too would pass and all would be good. Or
ask if they could hold my arnold palmer while I scooted home.
Many times when I am out and my kid is being an angel and
someone else’s isn’t. I often think, if only I could give her more patience to
get through this moment because it too will pass. But I certainly don’t yell at
the woman. In fact, I don’t even think that this is her fault.
Next time I
plan to walk over and say “I’ve been there, it is hard. Can I help you?” This
is not the first time I have had a rough day in public. But this is the first
time I have been yelled at for losing patience. And it doesn’t feel good.
So I say to all the moms out there. Be Kind. Support. Help.
